Boys

It's Friday night, the kids are playing at a neighbor's, my husband is re-building the pool filter (don't ask), I have had a nap, dinner is cooked and I started looking around the house for something to do. So here I sit. I tell you this because usually before I write anything here, it had been rolling around in in my brain for a while but today you just get whatever spews out.

First the ever important score card -- 33 down -- 1 to go!!!!! Hooray! I am so ready to be done getting sicker and start getting better. BTW, boost hurts. Every day. And, the lady uses a Sharpie to draw on my very sensitive nipple scar. Every day. Boost also makes me very, very tired. Although the radiation is going to be over on Monday, I am sure the tired will continue well past that time.

One thing I am glad to be almost done with applying creme everywhere. This has become a family project. Since my back was being radiation as well as my front, I had to have help applying the creme three times a day. Well, since the boys are here with me, they got the job at least twice a day. After trying numerous times to keep myself covered and modest during creme application, I finally gave up. They were just going to have to see my naked breasts like all of the medical professionals in San Antonio already have done. At first, the boys argued over who had to do it. Then, it seemed as if they just didn't care anymore. This led Paul and I to have some strange discussions about how they would feel about breasts when they finally got to see some that didn't belong to their mother. Would the attitude be "been there, done that", what else have you got? My wise friend graciously assured me the breast are not like that at all. She promised me that Andrew and Ben, like all young men, would eventually view breasts as "seen one, want to see them all".

Aside from being able to discuss breasts without even cracking a smile (do you know any other 11 and 13 year olds that can do that?), the boys are doing very well. In the past few weeks they have really stepped up their activities to help around the house. They take on any job I ask (usually) willingly. Sweetly, in the last week or so, Andrew has been a little more worried about me. Remember the chemo eyes, with the dark circles? They are back. Apparently, when I look bad and start sleeping a lot, it bothers Andrew. So not only is he extra helpful, he is also extra upset if he thinks he has done something wrong or hurt me. I have gone out of my way to make sure he knows that I am OK. For Andrew, puberty mixed with a mom with cancer, has made it quite an exceptionally emotionally challenging year. But he is going to make some lucky girl a great husband some day, especially if she likes lotion on her back.

"Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him." James 1:12